Off to the Garden State

Okay kids, I am off tomorrow to the Garden State(NJ) for some fun with an old friend. Will look forward to coming back and seeing where the dust settled around referrals. 23rd, 24th? 28th? Pick a number any number, big bucks no whammies.
All I have to say if it's the 23rd........
NO DEAL!!!

Okay, now let's just see the babies!

2000 visitors!

Just in case you were wondering, I just looked to see who was the lucky 2000th visitor to our site. Drum roll please......Someone from Burneby, British Columbia, they visited on 10-20-06 our month LID anniversary, and they visited for a mere 12 seconds. Must have gone to the speed reading class. Anyway, thank you to all that have visited, and to those who have left such nice comments. You don't know how much it means to have you just drop me a couple of words of encouragement. Those comments always come on the right day, when I need it the most.
Thanks again, and here's to the next 2000.
Sorry C1 that it wasn't you, but we can pretend if you like.

May I have cheese with my WHINE please??

Each month when referrals come I get a little excited with wonderment of how far they might get? Maybe this will be the month where all of sudden things turn around, and we actually see some progress, and we can visually see that someone is actually working in China. Obviously, if they only made it to the 23rd, then we know that no one is working, they all just keep freaking going on VACATION-Dude I would like a vacation, a vacation from WAITING!!! So this month I am not excited, not anticipating, not even hopeful, not going to keep refreshing the CCAA website on Sunday night. So for those getting your referrals please know that I am sorry, but the reality for the rest of us is, that we are not one month closer, and they are *officially* 15 months behind; it is just a little too much right now. On a side note to those who happen to be reading and have been waiting far longer than we have, and want to tell me to suck it up we have a long way to go...I just have this to say. We have been LID for a month, but you know that second you start your paperwork is when your really start waiting...remember? Plus most everyone started this process thinking they were going to be waiting 8-10 months tops, that was not so terrible to get a grasp of in your mind. You started this wait, and had part of your wait to be hopeful. We have started our LID waiting with 2-3 years ahead of us-so we feel like we are climbing Everest from the bottom. So please don't be so quick to snap at me so early in this game of chess.
Hope is not really in the cards right now.

Here's to our 1 month anniversary of being LID, if that actually means anything at this point. And here is to my 2000 hit coming up in I would guess the next 12 hours. I know what it says on that little ticker on the side, but that was just done in the last month or so. My sitemeter show 1994 hits. Not sure how, not sure why, and really not sure how you could have that many hits, and have so few comments....must be very boring, and not very amusing, and a lot of accidental hits looking for chinese sailing stories or something.

Well, well there little missy aren't you in just a pisspot mood?? Yes, thank you I will have some cheese with my WHINE!!!! I need me some good referral news, even a good referral story. I like thinking one referral round at a time, then it doesn't seem so far away. if you were number 24 or 25 in line you would not feel as cruddy as I do, but when you say 25 months that just seems like I need my own sherpa to start carrying the burdan of this wait.

Some issues that are bothering me right now.....

1. Can TIVO not figure out how to allow football to run long(every freaking Sun) and understand despite the change in time, if I have selected The Amazing Race to be tivoed (is that even a word?) then that means regardless of what time the show comes on, I want it to tape the whole blessed show. Yes, that is right just after Peter/Sara & the Barbies finished their alligator wrestling it STOPPED, and asked me if I wanted to delete or keep. We had to wait until this morning to find out the results. We had the TV on while we were working on building shelves for all of my shoes, but didn't think a thing about it....as we were tivoing it (right? no worries) It really was irritating, and more so when we then tivoed The Morning Show so we could wake up and see who was booted off, and for whatever reason they don't have them on like they do Big Brother and Survivor. Very disappointing. They finally gave the rundown on the website, and now so frustrated that we didn't get to see them explain the whole new twist to non elimination rounds. On a final Amazing Race note, how irritating is that Peter? If I were Sara, I would take off my leg, and whack him over the head. You notice he has her do all the hard stuff, and he stands on the sidelines offering patronizing cheers.

2. This is really bugging me, and am quite frankly surprised that this subject isn't burning up the Yahoo message boards. What the hell?? Do we actually think that Madonna waited the 49 days that we waited for our I171, or my friend that waited 12 weeks for hers? There is no International Adoption in Malawi(sp?) but they commented that you would have to be in the country for 18 months before being allowed to pursue an adoption from there. Extra (the end all, be all in the world of celebrity) interviewed the dad, and it sounded like she paid him like $10,000 and she donated $3 mil to an orphanage, stayed 8 days and WHAMO her adoption was complete. Celebrities seem to have so much clout in getting stuff done when it affects them, so if any of them actually had to go through what the rest of us go through to realize this dream then maybe we would make some headway. Like getting the I171 extension, or making that process easier and more efficient. I think this just sends out a negative message that if you have enough money, and know the right people you to can go shopping for a child of your choice. I am sure if the $10,000 is true; that it is probably a lifetime of working salary for that man. A mere fortune.

3. Why are people so quick to judge?? Especially women?? We should be more supportive of each other.

4. I just received an email from Compass bank citing changes in charges for acct holders.
Not that this affects me personally, but noticed that they now charge a $72 fee for overdrafts. Yes, you heard me right $72. Are you kidding me?? I realize that they have to try to provide consequences for those who make this a habit, but lets be realistic here. $72 is virtually pure profit for the bank, and this could literally ruin someone if they had a little mess up in their accounting(come on, we have all done it) This is highway robbery.

5. How can medication for pets cost so much?? I took our 12 year old cocker spaniel to the vet last week. She is having some additional back problems(back surgery last Nov) so for the vet to look at her, clean her ears($36 just for that 5 min of their time) and 3 presciptions, I walked out of there 30 min later with a $196 bill, and that was after using a $15 off coupon. What do people do that can't even buy their own presciptions?? It was worth it, she is back to her old self, and feeling great, and very sassy.

6. What is the deal with High School, and College kids driving cars nicer than most of the adults I know? What is that teaching our kids?

7. We saw a birthday party over the weekend for a 2 year old, and yes there was a full size carousel set up in the front yard of this mini mansion. Who is that party actually for? What happened to cupcakes and pin the tail on the donkey??

8. What has changed that has brought gas down to what seems to an affordable price? Doesn't the fact that I think $1.99 is reasonable bug you enough?? But really, what has changed??

9. If North Korea slows up our adoption(anymore than it has already been slowed up) Nicole and I are going over there to kick some khaki wearing, Hollywood movie watching arse. Kim Jung are you listening? And why is it that North Koreans have no cell phones or internet access, but North Korea as a country has a website??

10. Why does the Bachelor always keep women on that show that are not worth keeping, nor cute, nor sane?? Erica the princess, and Desiree the stripper?? what is the deal? Yes, I admit that I watch the Bachelor, no I don't need any comments on this.

Okay, it feels better to just vent these frustrations, but this is just the tip of the iceberg on the issues bugging me. These are just what have been bugging me the last 48 hours or so. I really need to start doing yoga, or going to a good therapist, maybe getting a life....

LID POLL

Something very exciting has happened....I finally got to vote in a Rumor Queen poll. It just warms my heart that Sept 06' was included in the poll. I know, ridiculous as it may seem, it just feels like progress, since there really isn't any progress going on in the adoption world, it helped my spirit a bit. So if you haven't done so already, and you were logged in before Oct 06' then jump on over and VOTE, it will be good practice for the upcoming elections that I know all of you will be participating in!! pls note Nicole is wrong, there was a poll that included Sept 06' dates...nanananananah sticking tongue out!!

On a final note, today is our 10 year anniversary, and it has already been such a great day. I have gotten some really cute, and thoughtful gifts.
Thanks honey, and Happy Anniversary.

Only 78 shopping days left!

Gosh, I can't believe another week has blown by. It literally feels like time is flying by. It is really hard to imagine that we started this process 7 months ago. Although there have been days that seem to creep by(especially while waiting for that I171) it has actually gone by very quickly. Oh the things I have learned and the friends that I have made in the last 7 months.
I just got an email from a group of girls that I went to college with, and we try to meet up at least once a month for lunch or dinner for some good quality girl talk. The proposed date was November 11th.....what November??? Where did Aug, Sept and Oct go?? That was the immediate thought that raced through my mind. Had I missed the end of summer, back to school, Labor day? No, but I seem to have little recollection of any of it. It is all a blurrrrr
November means that I need to start thinking about Thanksgiving, the Macy's Thanksgiving day parade(I love parades), warmer clothes, leaves in the pool, leaves to rake, kids coming home, buying Christmas presents, buying Christmas presents, getting Christmas decorations out and up, Christmas cards, and oh I know...buying Christmas presents. That is right kids, Christmas is only 11 weeks away, which means only 78 shopping days left on the calendar. 66 for those of you celebrating Hanukkah, and 79 if Kwanzaa is more your thing.
Regardless of the holiday you chose this year, it is freaking around the corner!!
Holy Crapoli, that means 07' is just 85 days away, and I am actually looking forward to the new year. I have told myself that if we get really lucky we will be getting our referral at the beginning of 08' so that would mean that when we celebrate New Years this year, that we could possibly be just a year away from seeing that much anticipated picture of our daughter(this is a really sad confession on my part that I think a year away sounds GREAT, even though when we started this process we would have told you that we would have been home for months, and up to our necks in snuggles, smiles, poop, sleep deprevation, dresses, and pigtails) This would mean referral times hold steady at 15-16 months. Never hurts to hope. I will have a post to reevaluate this time frame after the first of the year. But for the next 70-80 days I am going to keep my eye on that prize. At least it will get me down the road, and through the holidays without a straight jacket*okay, maybe that is a slight exaggeration, as I feel like scrooge by about Dec 15th. Because like so many other women when it comes to vacations, and holidays, we are the crank that makes the wheel turn. If it were not for us, we would never travel on vacation, vacation would be an afternoon filled with a slip in slide, and a slurpee from 7-11, and holidays would come and go as though it were just another Tuesday.
So think back, feel good about how far you have come, and let's hope that the next 7 months blow by so quickly.
TIME FLIES WHEN YOU ARE HAVING FUN....grrrrrrrrr

bloggity room with a view

Per Walternatives thought I would share where I spend entirely too much time. This is my office, I am very fortunate to have my very own space(D is a little messy to share an office with) On my computer you will see a picture of my godmother with my godson Jack-I love that picture. The pot holding my pens/scissors was made by Taylor or Connor?? Not sure which one this one is,I have both, but one is at the kitchen desk. Then you will see a shoe sitting on the TV, here's the deal with that one when I was still flying, me and one of my BFF's would find the weirdest crap left on the plane, and drop it in each other's mailbox at work for a good laugh. That is one of her not so rare finds, and I just can't seem to part with it.(no worries folks, no one would risk missing their flight to go back to look for the princess shoe, we always turned in important stuff like wallets, IPOD's, drugs, flasks etc.. ) After looking at the pictures, it looks like I need to do a little organizing. The picture of the chair is my favorite place to sit, watch TV, read, or just chill. It was given to me after my godmother passed away, so it means a lot to me too. It doesn't really match, but I don't care about that, and I love for D to come and sit in there while I am on the computer. The other corner is my *craft* area. I am a really big scrapbooker (no comments peeps, it's a cool, and worthwhile craft) So this is where it all happens. I love having an area to keep all of my stuff out, and accessible. It is a joke that if I had a bathroom, and a refrigerator I would never really need to come out of there. It is one of my favorite places in our house.
So let us know where you blog or just do your stuff. Leave a comment and let me know where to come check it out.

I am so LUCKY!

D and I will celebrate our 10 year wedding anniversary in just a couple of weeks. As of late I have spent a lot of time thinking about our relationship, where we have been, and where we will go from here, and everything in between. I admit that there are times that you just get caught up in the day to day of living, and take what you cherish for granted. But with this impending date just around the corner it has made me take a step back to do the opposite. I have gone back and looked through pages upon pages of pictures, stacks of cards, and cute notes that have been written in the past 14 years that we have been together. It has reminded me of how incredibly lucky I am to be married to such a wonderful human being. I know, I know, it sounds corney, or cliche, but I really feel as though I am one of the luckiest girls in town. I think I know plenty of people that are happily married, and going through married life just fine. I don't think I know that many people that are completely overwhelmed by their feelings for their spouse that they can't begin to tell someone how it feels. That is me in a nutshell. It would take a dissertation, and a boring(yawn) one at that to tell you all the things D has done for me, said to me, taught me, showed me, and how much he has loved me.

If you go back in the archives you can read how we met, and what a fateful meeting it was. I have never doubted for a second that it was really meant for us to meet, but I have had moments of sheer panic thinking how easy it could have been for us to have just passed one another like two ships passing in the night. The stars were definitely aligned that day. I was only 25 when we met, and this relationship has shaped me into the person that I am proud to be. I feel fortunate to have had those very important maturing years with someone who is so focused on good self esteem, self confidence, and diamond hard morals and values.

We have a 9 year age difference, D was previously married, and has 2 children from that marriage. I have often been asked if I ever wished that I had met someone without such a past(excuse me, do I know you? Is what I want to ask when asked this particular question) There obviously have been moments when life would have been easier to deal with if we didn't have some of those issues, but not for more than just a moment. D is the man he is based on the experiences he has had, and people that have been in his life. If he didn't have that past to draw from, maybe he wouldn't be the man, husband, or father that he is today.
Something was said the other night while we were at a party that has been said to us before, but for some reason it really just seemed so poignant to me that night. They asked if I had children of my own; funny question since I feel like Taylor and Connor are my own. None of us remember our life before each other. Anyway, back to the point I answered that I did not, and David said we are in the middle of adopting a baby from China. Now a lot of times we get pure excitement, smiles, and confessions of wishing or wanting to do the same. But other times as in this case it is pure shock and awe;that is difficult for the person to hide. Right on the verge of horrified that D would be willing to start all over with child rearing. I guess since I feel like D and I have been hand in hand in the raising of T & C that I feel like we are both choosing to start all over in rearing a child. But when I think more carefully about it, I realize once again how generous D is. He is completely starting over, and he is doing so with excitement, anticipation, and complete desire. That is just so typical of D.

So now for the things that make me feel so lucky, and confirm that I am married to one of the greatest guys ever. Mind you this is a condensed version. I have stories of things this man has done for me that would bring tears to your eyes, but I will spare you a longer post, and just get to what I love so much about my husband. D is so smart,funny, generous, honest, amazing values, ambitious, loving, a smart ass, quirky, great father, hard working, good dresser, beautiful eyes, willing to offer compliments when due, thoughtful, great taste, not a lingerer, great husband, great son, animal loving, smirky, patient, open minded, empathetic, very comfortable in his own skin, no pretense about him, well educated, well traveled, kind, even tempered, doesn't raise his voice, willing to offer his help, not a know it all, great friend, has pure love of his family, willing to show emotion, a bit of a workalholic, appreciative, drives too fast, loves acronyms,loves trees, is a risk taker, and he never ceases to amaze me with his love for me. 14 years after meeting, he makes me feel like the most important person in the world. He surprises me, he remembers all the important stuff, he always knows how to cheer me up, he knows how to make me laugh, and usually knows just what to say to me and the kids. Most importantly he knows when to just let me be, and offer a hug. I am so lucky, T & C know how lucky they are, and this new baby will realize so quickly how lucky she is to have this amazing daddy. If D were to tell you, he would just say "I am the one that is so lucky" Here's to 30 more honey.